Fallout 3,

I honestly do not know where to start with this letter. We have known each other for such a short time,  but it has felt like you have been a part of me for so much longer. You have shown me so many things in the last few months, things I had never thought possible and I am so very grateful to have you in my life. For once, I am finally able to be myself around someone and for that I can never thank you enough. Who else could I run around all day with killing Molerats with a plank of wood without being mocked? Even when I bludgeon helpless Wastelanders to death, you are there my love, watching their heads roll alongside me. We were meant to be Fallout 3!

In the 99 days that we have been together, we have been through so much. I cannot begin to describe the fear I felt when that Behemoth suddenly decided it wanted to tear us apart (literally), but you pulled out your Chinese Assault Rifle and you sure did own that son of a bitch! I jumped with joy when that beast fell to the ground as dead as my sex life will be once my partner realises how much of a nerd I am.

Do you remember that time we blew Megaton to smithereens? Oh how we laughed! And that young lady who kept flirting with you and asking you to help her with her silly little “research”? Well, I’m glad she isn’t much of a challenge for me now.

Oh Fallout 3, what ever would I do with out you? The many hours we have shared, stealing bottles of Nuka Cola, out running Deathclaws and trying to work out how to maim those little brats who insist in calling us “mungos”. I truly cannot remember what my days were spent doing before you burst onto the scene in a blaze of 1940s classics.

And how you have made everything so much more easier for me! Never in my 20yrs on this earth would I ever think of saying that all my problems could be solved with one simply system – V.A.T.S. What you have brought into my life is a button press away from pure bliss. I feel like the luckiest lady in the world Fallout 3, and my eyes twinkle with delight when I see your face getting covered in blood, eye balls and splinters of bone.

My life now holds new meaning with you in it and my heart leaps in my chest every time you whip your Pipboy out for me to play with. I know we had problems at first when I found it difficult to navigate properly, but you were very patient with me and slowly I grew to learn how to handle your Pipboy correctly and it only made our bond stronger!

I will hold you close to my heart Fallout 3, even when your DLC comes to me on the 27th of this month and we end our time together before your successor sweeps me from my feet. Your achievement points will be the sign of our perfect time together, I will never forget how you have changed my life.

All my love,
Elysium

The World of Gaming can be a difficult one to live in at times. We encounter many challenges that we find very hard to overcome. Sometimes we push ourselves to out limits and prevail, but there are times in our Gaming World where we must wave the white flag of defeat, hang our heads in shame and slowly slide the Unfinishable to the bottom of the pile.

This isn’t a list of the World-Wide Unfinishables, because we all have different skills and talents. I know people who can get a headshot while eating a sandwich, I know others who can create amazing characters who seriously kick-bum. This Top 5 is my personal Top 5 – They are games I have spent hours with, pulling my hair out, screaming at the TV and (eventually) throwing to the back of my cupboard.

# 5 – The Godfather

I’m a HUGE Godfather fan. I have seen the movies more times than I’ve eaten Yorkshire Puddings (that would be a lot for people who aren’t aware of us Brits ‘n our Yorkie obsession!). When a game was released for the 360 I pounced on it and set about conquering businesses, blowing up drug dens and generally working my way to Don status. However, there is this one section of the game where you need to storm a room full of men with shotguns. Now these weapons aren’t unbalanced, but take a few hits to the head and you’re done for. I cannot seem to get past that section no matter what I do! There are four men as I enter the room packing heat. I manage to take the first two out, but by that time my health has been drained from four multiple rounds from four shotguns being pumped into my body. I have tried different combinations of weapons, I’ve tried storming the room spraying, I’ve tried to lead each guy out of the  room one-by-one to pick off individually, but no matter what weapon or tactic I try to use, I fail. That level, for me, makes The Godfather Unfinishable and has caused me to put that game aside until I feel strong enough to take on the shotgun bandits once again!

# 4 – Final Fantasy VII

Hi, my name is Elysium and I think Final Fantasy VII is Unfinishable.

Don’t laugh.

Stop it.

…Please?

I just cannot finish this damn game! It’s the final boss battle, really, it is! I have struggled with it so damn much and I’ve just gotten so tired of levelling up that I’ve thrown in the towel. I know the ending of the story through reading it online, I just.. I can’t do it anymore guys! I have spent so many hours of my life on this game and I am genuinely disappointed with myself for being unable to complete one of the most completable games out there! It’s a Final Fantasy game, it’s not rocket science!

# 3 – Overlord

In 3rd place is Overlord. I don’t want to bad mouth this game because I love it’s little cute quirks! The minions are downright adorable when they scream “For the Overlord!” and they smash up pumpkins to wear on their heads! I also love the overall uniqueness of the game. The only downside is I get lost very very easily in this game and if I return to it after a few weeks of not playing it, I have absolutely NO clue of what I am meant to be doing or where I am meant to be going. It’s because of this that I’ve placed this game near the bottom of my pile – I’m not done with it just yet, but I’ve owned it for well over a year and a half now and I’ve not picked it up in at least a year.

Overlord, you’re Unfinishable to me. We will change this one day my love, but you must be patient with this poor little impatient, forgetful gamer.

# 2 – Eternal Sonata

When I first started playing this game I was quite smitten with it – I loved the use of music within the game and thought the voice acting was really good. The gameplay wasn’t bad and although the battle system wasn’t anything to write home about, I found myself enjoying the game. However, and that’s a BIG “however” – The puzzles in this game are stupid. I’m not saying that because I spent a few hours trying to solve one, but because I have seen bunch of people also struggling with the puzzles. Now, it’s not the fact that the puzzles themselves are difficult, they’re not, they’re quite simple, but it’s because there are ZERO hints saying that a) you’re in the middle of a puzzle and b) what the hell you’re even meant to be doing. It’s is absolutely ridiculous!

My second bug about this game is the boss battles. I am currently stuck quite early on in the game on a Pirate ship. Yup, I can’t defeat the skinny little Pirate Wench. She just wipes my team out in one go. Unfortunately I don’t have enough healing potions, nor are my healers strong enough to do multiple heals. It’s such a pain in the arse and after 15 attempts at the battle, I’ve given up. Unbalanced Pirate Wenches make the beautifully crafted Eternal Sonata Unfinishable to me.

#1 – Ninety-Nine Nights

The Most Unfinishable of the Unfinishables is Ninety-Nine Nights – The most annoying hack-and-slash game of 2006! This game involves moving through maps tearing away are hundreds, if not thousands, of enemies (ala Dynasty Warriors). The only problem with Ninety-Nine Nights is the majority of maps require you to sit and work at it for at least 45 minutes plus….. with no mid-map saves. That’s right, so if you get right to the final huge battle of Map 1, you will be royally fucked (and royally pissed off) if you die because you then have to re-do the WHOLE BLOODY MAP FROM THE BEGINNING! There are no words in existence to describe just how much I want to hurt someone for creating a game like that without save points. I managed to finally pass the first map, only to be thrown into a BIGGER map that requires more hours of my life AND STILL NO SAVE POINTS!

I don’t think I need to continue describing why Ninety-Nine Nights is at the top of my list. It is just one of those games I truly despise and yet I find myself coming back to it every so often to see if I could muster enough skill to finally make it Finishable.

The Conclusion!

I would like to think that all of the above games are ones I will eventually be able to complete, but I really doubt that I’ll have the patience to really give any of them another go. So, because I don’t want to look like the only gamer here who is unable to complete games - What are your Unfinishables?

A few of our readers may have seen me post this over on the Xbox forums, but I felt it deserved it’s own spot on G&G, so here it is.

I post (and lurk) on a variety of forums aimed at gamers who happen to also lack a tackle. I see a topic that appears quite often and I know a lot of you will have come across these posts also.  They seem to be related to how men only EVER seem to chat to girls gamers online because they’re after one thing – Nudes, n00ds, sexyfuntimechats or nudz.

I’ve seen a few posts elsewhere recently where a couple of male gamers were looking for women to game with. Now one of these posts seemed like the typical ~pervy~ guy looking to chat women up, but the other ones seemed like genuine requests. All three of these posts were flamed and/or locked. I understand why a lot of people get annoyed at men looking for women to game with. However, when I first started seriously gaming I would post threads saying “Looking for guy gamers to play with!” – NOT because I was some sad, lonely girl looking for attention, but because I truly hated the initial selection of female gamers there were out there. Nothing but cat-fights, back-stabbing and attention seekers. So I would specifically seek out male gamers. I also get along better with men, have more things to talk about with them so it seemed only normal for me to post about finding men to game with online! …But when a man wants to chat to a woman online, perhaps because he finds talking to women more fun than talking to a guy, while doing something they enjoy together (i.e; gaming), all hell breaks loose and that guy is officially branded a pathetic pervert. I have some male friends who come to me when they want to talk about their personal life, because they feel as though their male friends would laugh at them. I have some guys talk to me because I don’t just chat about cars and the latest FHM magazine.. And it goes in reverse as well, I seek out my male friends when I want to geek out about the latest Battlestar Galactica episode, or I hunt someone down because I’m sick of hearing about babies, shoes and handbags (alright, so I’m guilty of generalising on both genders here, but you all know what I’m getting at).

Now I realise that yes, there are a bunch of horny little boys out there jerking off to the thought of a hawt chick sitting behind their keyboard/controller. I too have been sent pictures of an erect dick via XBL, but unlike a lot of women, I laugh it off. I know that there are ladies out there who aren’t able to just shrug off things like that, but it is a very big shame that those women feel the need to attack any man out there who is actively looking to game with a woman. These are the same women who will spend their days whining at guys who think all girl gamers should be in the kitchen, while they sit there and do exactly the same. Branding a male gamer a pervert is the same as female gamers being branded attention whores who are ready to get to their tits out at any given moment.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not sitting here and telling women to forget about the behaviour they may have received from a small percentage of all male gamers, what I am asking is if it’s right to tar every male gamer with the same brush?

Stepping away from my usual posts about new releases, I want to talk about a website I frequent often and want to share with the gaming world!

Gamer Tag Pics (GTP) is a vast social networking site for Xbox 360 gamers all over the globe! Since starting up in 2003, it has amassed numerous amounts of users from all sorts of gaming backgrounds together.

The one thing I love about GTP is the fact that you have full control of your own corner of the web – From profile creation, blogging and even the ability to write your very own game reviews for the website! With an extensive search engine, featured blogs, forums and the option to create a full HTML “intro” page to your profile, there really is a lot to do on the website!

Similar to places like MySpace & Facebook you can post galleries of photos, check out your friend’s “feed” to see what’s going on in their gaming/GTP life, poke around their Gamerscore more indepth and have a chat with people online via the forums/PM system!

Setting up your profile with GTP is a cinch – Just register using your GamerTag for Xbox Live, fill out the gaming-geared bio, upload a photo (or five!) and you’re off! Once your profile is complete, get to searching your online friends with the GTP GamerTag search engine – It really is as easy as it sounds; just put in your XBL friend’s GamerTag and, if they’re a user, their profile will be ready and waiting for you to add them! Be sure to send a message to any of your XBL friend’s who aren’t on Gamer Tag Pics and get them to register!

GTP is a great place to find new like-minded friends and is PERFECT for clans who are looking to recruit new members! Setting up matches, finding a buddy to run through a co-op game together or even just finding people to chat in a party together, is a easy as pie on the GTP Forums! Don’t worry – You do not need to re-sign up to join in on the fun at the forums, just use the same login and password for the main GTP site!

Oh, and while you’re busy registering yourself away on GTP - Don’t forget to add little ol’ me!

So I sat at work all of yesterday just waiting to rush home so I can download and check out the new Xbox Live experience! It took 6 minutes to download and install. 6 minutes is a long time when you’re overly excited, so I went to make a cup of tea to calm myself down. I did take pictures of the whole process I went through, but unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be a media reader in the house that’ll work with a Compact Flash card so alas, poor reader, there are not any funky Skylark pictures to enjoy!

I spent a good 45 minutes “experiencing” the new XBL interface, trying to see what was new, what had been given a face lift and what had disappeared. Aside from the obvious visual changes (and the addition of the Wii-like avatars), there isn’t MUCH to really sing about. The only new features that I personally see (I don’t get Netflix, for example) – Are the party rooms and the option to rip your game to your hard drive. Both really useful and user-friendly changes, it looks like Microsoft really did know what us gamers were looking for.

My only issues were constant freezing. I had my poor screen freeze on me no less than 4 times last night while in a large party chat. I found that it only froze when viewing the “Friends” page with all the new avatars. I’m sure this is just because it’s a new system and no doubt we’ll see another update within a week or so to get rid of this bug.

With the XBL changes only coming into play yesterday, I wanted to get in there quick and grab people’s initial feelings and thoughts on the new Xbox Live Experience. I got quite mixed feedback, some enjoying the new changes, some feeling as though they weren’t much to write home about. Have a quick read of the following gamer’s opinions and feel free to add your own into the mix!

“New XBL – indifferent. hasn’t revolutionised anything. just added needless bells and whistles.” – mutster101

“It really, really wishes it was made by Nintendo. I knew the avatar thing would be a rip off of ‘Mii’, but it even has the same backing music.” – Shin00bie

“I have to say the new interface is a surprise it is easy to navigate and all the new functions work as advertised. Great job Microsoft.” – Sshevie

“I like the new avatar/party idea… It’s only the first night so of course there are a few bugs – had a few party’s crash, one during some Left4Dead which wasn’t fun – my avatar is cool beans though so big smiles..” – Doc Brown976

“It looks better, its faster, saving games to HDD is great and may let my 5th Xbox survive longer than 6 months. My themes that I paid for are now a waste of money, I can only see half of them. The little ‘Wii’ people are pathetic, but everyone who thinks they are pathetic has spent time changing their clothes and trying to make them look cool (myself included). Oh and the party chat is great and can be exploited in team games like Gears of War 2!” – DAVO660

“First impression was like ‘Wow, it’s brilliant’, but looking through it all. All I can say is why did they rush to put it out before it was completed. Plus I hope we can have new clothing & stuff like animals for our avatars or a program to make own!” – Da Raging Husky

“After using the NXE for a week now i must say overall i am impressed with the new look. The only negative I can find is that the achievements tab that showed your score and total score is missing. A small gripe as i can see it on the website.” – UnholiestHojo

I’ll be writing a follow up in the next couple of weeks to see how the same bunch of people feel the same the new interface after they’ve had a chance to get used to it, so be sure to check back!

So between playing Gears of War 2, Fallout 3 and Fable 2 I am playing Mirror’s Edge. I am completely gamed out to the max at the moment, but I can’t complain because this is what I love to do! I really am such a game hopper and I can’t deny it any longer. Don’t get me wrong, I am able to stick to one game and see it the whole way through, but when a hundred and one great games all come out at once, I just can’t help myself!

For those not in-the-know, Mirror’s Edge is a first person action-adventure game out on the 360 (obviously) and PS3. You play as Faith, a “runner”, living in under a totalitarian regime. Without blabbering on too much about the storyline, you’ve got a copper for a twin sister, and two dead parents. Your job is to deliver messages across the City and you do this by.. well, running.

My first impressions of this game were quite positive – The environment is visually stunning and the controls weren’t difficult to grasp. I will admit that it was a little weird at first using the LB and LR primarily for movement (jumping/crouching), but once I got the hang of it I was leaping over obstacles and sliding under then like a pro!

However, and there’s always a however, the game gets very repetitive very quickly! I am fully aware that every game breaks down to moving from Point A to Point B, but in Mirror’s Edge it is literally that and nothing more. There are no “side quests” there are no items to hunt down (unless you count finding 3 bags per level as “hunting”, but even then it’s not a requirement), people to squeeze information out of, there are no true objectives aside from moving from Point A to Point B – Which basically involves running a small gauntlet of walls, electric fences and a few enemies with insanely accurate weapons.

If that wasn’t bad enough, the creators done a very foolish thing to deal with the loading sections – Half of them are mid-level. You’ll be running around a corner and BAM! the screen has frozen and out comes the “loading” sign. This makes you lose your momentum and really pisses me off! If you’re not running into invisible loading walls, your standing in elevators for 2-3 minutes at a time, twiddling your runner thumbs.

Aside from the above annoyances, the game itself isn’t too shabby – The gameplay is quite inventive and I’d love to see the Assassin’s Creed team pick up on how this is done, the music is decent (although cuts in and out at random points) and the cut-scenes are quite unique as well, they’re not motion capture, but animated shorts.

To end this quickly (so I can get back to gaming) Mirror’s Edge has it’s faults, but is worth a rental. If you can deal with the annoyances listed above than you will enjoy the game. There isn’t much replayability on this though and time trials (where you try to beat your friend’s “ghosts”) only have so much that they can hold.

I do hope to see a Mirror’s Edge 2, I just only hope they can really throw the money at it and get some more substance in there!

What can I say about Gears of War 2? There’s not a lot that I can say that you probably haven’t already heard elsewhere really. This game is Gears of War, on steroids. It’s just as intense as it’s predecessor, only with more enemies, more weapons and more FUN! I ran through the single player quickly yesterday and loved every minute of it – When the creators likened this game to playing the star of a top Hollywood production, they weren’t kidding. You really are dragged backwards through a hedge full of emotions.

Without revealing any spoilers (because they’re not fun now, are they?) GoW2 is definitely set to be Game of the Year and everyone who owns a 360 should have this game.

End of.

Part III of my E3 write-up. It is now Sony’s turn in the hot seat. I have to admit, I went into their conference with a bad attitude, not wanting to like a thing they would proceed to shove down my throat, but I came out mightily impressed by what was on offer and I am actually considering that maybe, perhaps, with a little more convincing I might just possibly pick up a Playstation 3 at some point in the future.

SONY

Resistance 2 (THIS TRAILER IS A MUST-WATCH FOR EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!)

Coming exclusively to the PS3, this purdy little thing is due for release this Fall! I was left absolutely gob-smacked by the trailer and on the edge of my seat wanting more, more, MORE! It looks very much like Gears of War crossed with Battlestar Galactica with a hint of Half Life 2. Just watch the freakin’ trailer, mmkay?

Little Big Planet

Coming to the PS3 October 2008. I have to admit, Sony went about showcasing off this game AND showing their numbers off in a very smart way. I was really impressed and I do believe I’ve fallen in love with Sackboy, bless.

- God of War 3

Out for the PS3 exclusively in 2009. Another game that is feeding the devil on my right shoulder all sorts of nonsense on why I should get myself a Playstation 3! Not a lot else is really known about GoW3, but I sure am excited all the same!

- inFamous

Another exclusive due out on the PS3 in Spring 2009. A sandbox-type game similar to Crackdown, with some awesome looking powers. Not too typed about this game as I wasn’t 100% satisfied with Crackdown, but if I do get a PS3 it’ll definitely be something I pick up as a rental.

DC Universe Online

Coming to the PS3/PC, release date to be announced. This reminds me of City of Heroes/Villains. Can’t say I’m overly excited really, I’m a huge comic book / graphic novel fan.. But I just can’t get into this kind of game, personally. Saying that, I’m not much of a MMO gamer either – The only one that caught my attention for World of Warcraft and that love affair only last 6 months before boredom struck in and a more shinier game stole my heart.

MAG: Massive Action Game

PS3 exclusive, release date to be announced. This is set to be a massive game. 256 players, yes, TWO-HUNDRED-AND-FIFTY-SIX PLAYERS at once, divided into 8 person squads. Your soldier levels up and gains new skills as you play. Big shame the trailer was all CGI, but I got the feeling this game is still in it’s very early stages of development. I would like to think we’ll be seeing this in 2009, but I’m going to put some money on the table here and say it’ll be a 2010 release at best.

Other Announcements:

- Buzz: Out on the PS3 this September. It’s the same old trivia gameshow all over again. Nothing to be overly excited about, unless you host a lot of parties.

- Ratchet & Clank PSP Pack: Costing you $199, this is out this October. This new pack will include Ratchet & Clank: Size Matters, a silver PSP slim, a 1GB memory stick and a UMD of National Treasure : Book of Secrets.

- Resistance: Retribution: This is the PSP sequel to the original Resistance game, set for release in Spring 2009.

- LEGO Batman Bundle: Guess what, this is for the PS2! This bundle will include the PS2 system, the LEGO Batman game and a DVD of Justice League: A New Frontier.

- Ratchet & Clank Future: Quest for Booty: For the PSN, due to be released this summer for only $15. This is basically similar to what Valve have been doing with Half Life 2 – Releasing small “episodes” inbetween larger ones.

- New PSN Games. New games for the Playstation Network: Fat Princess, Pixeljunk Eden, Flower, Crash Commando, Siren: Blood Curse, Pain Amusement Park and Ragdoll Kung Fu.

- PSN Movie Store: You can now rent and purchase movies over PSN. Watch them on your PS3, or send them to your PSP. Rentals will run from $2 to $3 for TV shows and $3 to $5 for movies. Purchases will begin at $15.

So that’s it folks! The larger E3 conferences have all be done – I’ve been keeping an eye on the smaller ones and will report back anything deem post-worthy! Although with the Internet exploding with information on E3, you probably have heard all the best news pieces already!

So yesterday we talked about Microsoft’s E3 Conference. I have been up all night talking about all the new bits of information we were given, the new videos and I am still buzzing with excitement over the major games I listed over in that article!

But I digress.. yesterday was Microsoft’s day. Today we are going to tear apart the Nintendo E3 Conference!

I want to pre-warn everyone before they continue. The Nintendo conference was absolutely awful. There were so many moments while watching that I physically cringed and felt genuinely embarrassed for the people on stage. As the conference went on it only got worse and worse until the sheer embarrassing behaviour peaked in a climactic ending where… Well, you’ll see.

NINTENDO

Animal Crossing: City Folk

Our for the Nintendo Wii later this year. This is basically the next step up in the Animal Crossing life. Still insanely cute, insanely repetitive, but this would be one of the few games I would buy if I owned a Nintendo Wii. The added bonus is the Wii Talk implementation – Which you people can come to your town and you can.. well.. talk to them!

Shawn White Snowboarding

Our for the Nintendo Wii later this year. I’ve got absolutely no idea who this Shaun White person is. I’m guessing he is the Tony Hawk of the snowboarding scene, right? Anyway, he brings his game to the Wii with balance board functionality.. Which still looks like bathroom scales to me.

Star Wars: Clone Wars

Another game for the Nintendo Wii, set for release later this tear. I’m not a Star Wars fan (Trekkie through ‘n through) so this, to me, just seems like a generic Star Wars game that looks exactly like the last one. Feel free to moan at me for knowing nothing about the previous Star Wars games, I really don’t care.

Wii Sports Resort

Set for release Spring 2009 for the Nintendo Wii. This is a new motion game that uses the previously the new Motion Plus accessory (an accessory for the Wii Remote. The add-on attaches to the bottom of the Wii-mote and more accurately traces motions in 3-D space by better orienting the controller). This accessory comes with Wii Resort. The game includes Disc Dog, Jet Ski and Sword Fighting.

Extra “lolz” for the sexual tension between those three on stage – “Bad wrist action” and “You really like that throttle, don’t you Reggie?”

Other Announcements:

- Guitar Hero On Tour: Decades: Set for release, this fall, on the Nintendo DS! Yet another GH game. We all know what the GH series is about so this really needs no explanation at all, does it?

- Pokemon Rangers: Shadow of Alma: Out November 8th 2008 on the Nintendo DS. My Pokemans, let me show you them.

- Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars: GTA on the DS – Something I can actually get excited about! Not 100% sure on the release date, but this does look mighty spiffy. I look forward to getting back into Liberty City!

- Cooking Navi: An English version of the popular Japanese interactive cooking guide. Coming this year to the Nintedo DS. It’s basically a cook book for your DS. I’d rather use the Internet.

- Rayman Raving Rabbids: TV Party: I miss the days when Rayman was cool. A Nintendo Wii game set for release Late 2008.

- Call of Duty: World at War: Co-op FPS for the Nintendo Wii, coming later this year. I do love me some CoD, but I wont personally be getting this for the Wii. I’ve got a bigger and badder console to be playing this baby on!

The Climactic Ending – Wii Music

Prepare yourself for the BAD.

I’m going to let the two videos speak for themselves on that one. All I want to say here is..

Stay tuned for the final E3 Conference post – Sony!

AND IT’S DONE!

The three big names in our favourite Industry have now completed their slots at E3 2008 – Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo showcased games/features of the past, present and future to wet our gaming appetites and to get our fingers heading towards our bank cards.

I have to admit, I am emotionally beat from the excitement! Anyone who has been talking to me in the past few hours has probably realised this FROM THE AMOUNT OF GAME RELATED INFORMATION I HAVE TYPED TO THEM IN CAPS!

So, who came out on top?

What are we to look forward to for 2008/2009?

What should we all spend our money on?

DON’T PANIC!

Over the next three posts I shall be breaking each conference down to include videos and small snippets of information, just for you!

Lets get rolling!

MICROSOFT

Gears of War 2

To be released November 7th, 2008. The campaign has 2 player co-op, but there will be a 5 player mode in multiplayer. You’ve still got the classic loveable chainsaw in tow, but you’ve not got a new weapon to enjoy – A flamethrower! You’ve also got elevators, grappling hooks and Locust-shields to enjoy! Oh, and lets not forget you get to ride a brumak. A FREAKIN’ BRUMAK PEOPLE!

Fable 2

To be released October 2008. This is a very creative RPG which enhances the innovative system of morphing one’s character based on their actions of good/evil (kind of like Overlord, if you have ever played that!) Your character will slowly morph into whatever you create it to be through your actions in-game. You can get drunk with friends, get a wife ‘n kids or.. do none of the above. It’s all up to you how you play, and create, your game. Sounds like a very unique experience and I cannot wait to try this out. Not to mention there is a co-op side to this that is just begging to be explored!

Resident Evil 5

To be released March 13th 2009 (DAY AFTER MY 21ST BIRTHDAY, HINT, HINT, HINT!) I think we all know the basic gist of all Resident Evil games – You’re human, they’re zombies, you’ve got the save humanity! I have to say, I was very impressed by the RE5 video. And I will be even MORE impressed if you get to use that bleedin’ chainsaw yourself at some point. We all know how obsessed I am with chainsaws are Gears of War.. But yes, this looks to be an amazing game and it’s a shame we’ve got to wait another 9 months to have it in our sticky little hands! The best thing about RE5, aside from the amazing graphics - IT. IS. MULTIPLAYER.

Fallout 3

Due out this Autumn. Well, what do I say about this game? It’s like Bioshock, but on the surface. It’s also by the same team who made Oblivion so you know this is going to fucking OWN YOUR FACE. I am extremely excited about this game & I don’t even know what to type here because I am so excited. I love the graphics, the environment and I was just to dive in head first and explore, explore, explore!

Revamped Dashboard

So, it looks as though the Dashboard is set for a complete revamp. New layout, new “avatars” and group chat options. Aside from the latter feature, I am personally not happy about this. I hope there will be an option to keep the dashboard as it is, to keep your gamerpics/themes.. But somehow I don’t think this is going to be happening. If I want a cutesy little avatar, I would move on over to the Wii. I’m a gamer, I want a simple little icon and that’s all. I think the general revamp is a huge waste of time (aside from multi-chat), but watch the video and decide for yourself. Welcome to the Mii60! An age I do not think I am going to enjoy much..

Other Game Announcements

- Rock Band 2: Out this September. Like Guitar Hero you get a large amount of tracks on a disc. You will be able to download approx 20 more songs when it’s released for the other systems in November.

- Squeenix (Square-Enix): Infinite Undiscovery to be released on September 2nd, Last Remnant November 20th and Star Ocean 4 Spring 2009. Not to forget that Final Fantasy XIII due to hit the 360!

- Guitar Hero: World Tour: Pretty self-explanatory there. This game needs no introduction. 85 tracks, all on the disc at launch.

- Lips: Your basic karaoke game, out this Christmas. You get two wireless mics with the game. Also comes with comes with the added ability to use your iPod/Zune for music.. But it has music on a disc as well if you don’t have any of the above.

- Scene-It: Box Office Smash: A new version of Scene-It. It looks like you’ll be able to use your new “Avatars” (see section below) in-game.

- You’re In the Movies: A game that uses the Xbox Camera to integrate you into movies at home.

- New XBLA games: Geometry Wars 2, Galaga Colonies, Uno Rush, Banjo-Kazooie, Portal: Still Alive and a new South Park game.

- Netflix integrated into XBL (US users only). Netflix customers will be able to stream movies to their Xbox for free. Your friends will also be able to view movies at the same time.

And that’s it for Microsoft! Keep an eye open for my Nintendo and Sony posts too!

So Square-Enix officially confirmed that FFXIII will be a multi-platform game in today’s E3 conference by Microsoft. That’s right folks, for those of us who haven’t turned to the darkside and picked up a PS3, we can now rejoice in our little gaming holes that Final Fantasy 13 will be coming to an Xbox 360 near us very soon!

I’ve been avoiding the Spore Creature Creator since it was released recently for really good reason – I knew I would get addicted to it. I can safely say my predictions were correct, I am fully hooked. It is 5pm and I have done nothing but fiddle around on this thing for the past two hours straight.

You can download the Spore Creature Creator here! Do not blame me when you lose hours of your life to this thing. You have two options to download – You’ve got the trial edition where you receive 25% of the body parts, or you can fork over a little cash and get the full 100% version.

And now, because I am absolutely besotted with my little creation, I would like to introduce you all to Tikka & Gekky!

TIKKA

GEKKY

I saw Stay Puft when I went to the London MCM Expo and had to snap this photo. So, that’s right folks! Your favourite Ghostbusting team are back in action this Autumn!

Set for release Sept 26th 2008 here in the UK, this game is set for a nice firm place in my “To bloody buy!” list. I have always been such a huge fan of the franchise and Stay Puft is too damn adorable to avoid. The game doesn’t look like it’ll set any new standards here, but if you’re a fan of the series you’re going to have to give this one a go for sure! I can’t wait to see what the achievements will be personally.

And I want to quickly apologise here – Due to me having to pack up and move I’ve not had a chance to really have time to sit down and write out an article for G&G. Things have been totally hectic for me, but this will change soon and I’ll be back in full force with lots of super articles for everyone!

Until then, have a trailer:

I may receive a lot of heat for what I am about to post here, but I am a big enough girl now to be able to deal with it and I hope that the people who read this are mature enough to see where I am coming from with this post.

As you may have read in my bio, I have been gaming for the past 15yrs. I originally started gaming with my Dad, then I moved onto to gaming with male friends, boyfriends and so on. What I am trying to emphasise here is that, for the most part, I grew up gaming with men. This never bothered me, but four years ago I became curious to see how many gamers were out there who also had a a double X chromosome. Without much hunting I found a large gaming community on a popular blogging website that was run for, and by, women. I remember having a quick browse, thought “What the hell.” and joined it. More recently I have joined the Xbox Live GamerChiX – Both communities together total up to around 10,000 girl gamers. That’s a lot of girl gamers.. and that’s a lot of shit I’ve come across that I don’t like.

Now don’t get me wrong, this post isn’t me ranting and raving about how truly awful the above named communities are, because they really are not bad at all. Any gaming community is a good one in my eyes and more power to people for coming together and sharing their passion as a group. However, it has come to my attention that; while there are many different types of gamers in general (Nintendo nerds, Halo whores etc), there are different types of girl gamers – The majority of which are the type of gamer I DO NOT want to be associated with.

Girl Gamer Type A: The Gamer (The Good)

This is the category I only occasionally see showing up when hanging around communities like the ones mentioned above. Thankfully Girls&Gaming is home to nothing but Type A girl gamers (and for that I love you all) and I have found a female environment I am comfortable with being in.

Type A girl gamers are the ones who don’t really refer to themselves as a “girl gamer”. They know that they are like every other gamer out there and believe that gender is completely irrelevant when kicking arse. This does not mean, however, that they ignore and hide their XX chromosomes behind their keyboards and controllers; they choose to embrace their gender while making as little fuss as possible.

Throughout my years as a gamer I have come across quite a few females who are just plain ol’ gamers. They fit in well with clans, they participate like any other person would with matches, tournaments and so forth. They do not bring attention to their femininity and demand special treatment. They are confident within themselves, as a gamer, to just be part of the crowd.

To sum it up, these are the girls are just gamers – Nothing more, nothing less.

Girl Gamer Type B: The Attention Whore (The Bad)

You have two types of annoying little attention whores – Those who aren’t really gamers who just pose in MySpacesque pictures and act like they know what they are talking about, when in reality they don’t. These type of girl “gamers” just regurgitate opinions and news that they have heard elsewhere. You may think I am talking out of my arse here, but I have come across quite a few of these kind of “gamers” and they really make me feel ill. Saying that, I have been amused by the amount of copy and pasted information I’ve see that they’ve found on Wikipedia or the review section of Amazon.com. These girls can mostly be found on rating sites or lingering around certain forums like a bad smell. They are avoided by everyone except really desperate, and horny, men.

The second type of attention whore is the one who does actually game, but doesn’t stop bringing attention to themselves while doing so. These kind of girls are the ones you’ll hear screaming “YOU GOT BEAT BY A GURL!” over mic. Type B girl gamers tend post on communities, forums and pretty much anywhere where they can be heard about how “boys are dumb” and all they strive to do is “kick boy butt!”. You’ll find them sporting “PROUD TO BE A GIRL GAMER!” icons in bright pink font. This is the kind of gamer that really irritates me to the bone (sorry, I just hate the colour pink). They insist that all men hate girl gamers and share (possibly exaggerated) stories about “the time that I got booted ‘cos I’m a girl and was winning!” Type B girl gamers also seem to come across the most rudest gaming store clerks ALL THE TIME. These sales assistants are willing to risk their own job just to comment on the girl’s gender and choice of the game they’re buying.

To sum it up, Type B girl gamers are like that annoying little itch that you can’t quite scratch.

Girl Gamer Type C: The Hypocritical Feminist (The Bitchy)

It is only in the last year or so that I have come to know the Type C girl gamer. This is the girl that really takes their gender to the next level. They are extremely aggressive towards other female gamers (regardless of Type A/Bness) and want everyone to know about it. Without pointing fingers and naming names, here is a quote from a Type C gamer that I came across:

I have to admit I am tougher on other girl gamers than I am the guys. In a weird way I feel like they’re representing all of us, so when they’re acting stupid, glitching, or just getting kills in cheap ways it aggravates the *** out of me and I’ve been known to be sort of a *** about it. My friend I play with all the time says that I hate other girl gamers, but that’s not the truth. I just hold them to a higher standard than the guys on there. Does that make sense?

Now I actually replied to this girl telling that it seemed a little odd that while she was striving for equality from all gamers she was, in turn, treating girl gamers differently. To this, she replied:

I’d just rather my ambassador to the community not be a foul mouthed, attention seeking kid. If we ever want to be treated equally we need to take a stand against crappy girl gamers, they’re giving the rest of us a bad name. That’s how I see it. I really can’t figure out why you’d be defending these kind of female gamers anyway.

Now this really got my back up. Not only did this Type C girl gamer insist on every women being an “ambassador” for the whole “girl gaming community”, but she admitted to holding all girl gamers to higher standards. Hypocritical much? I think so. I pretty much ended the conversation here as I knew it was not going anywhere. One lady did step in however and agree with myself, for which I was thankful. Type C girl gamers, while aiming for equality amongst all gamers of all genders, find themselves beating down on gamers of their own gender in some sort of “treat ‘em tough ‘n they’ll be learning!” ritual.

To sum it up, never argue with a Type C girl gamer – They only hear what they want to hear.

And An Afternote:

I am in no way an elitist gamer or someone who sits on a high horse. I am a gamer who is tired of a lot of the “girl gamers” I am coming across. I am one who does not need to wave her bra around for attention and does not need to wave it around for validation either. I would like to add here that you are your own person and you should be proud of who you are REGARDLESS of your gender. You do not need validation from anyone to partake in a hobby that you enjoy. All I ask is that, if you are a Type B or Type C gamer, you tone it all down a little bit. I will not call you an embarrassment to girl gamers everywhere because I don’t believe in any woman being an ambassador of the female gaming community. I sure as hell wouldn’t want anyone to think I’m sitting here representing everyone of my gender who picks up a controller or sits at a keyboard. It’s stupid and wrong to think that just because I own a pair of boobies I automatically stand for everyone else who does as well. That being said, by bringing attention to yourself as a “grrl gamer” you are just making matters worse for everyone. Take a leaf from the Type A group and just get on with your gaming.

I am open to hearing from other people about this topic and you are encouraged to reply to this article in ANY WAY that you see fit. Feel free to sing my praises or tell me to go to hell.

Keep on gaming folks!

Title: Viking: Battle for Asgard (aka Viking)

Release date: March 25th 2008 US / March 28th 2008 Europe

Developer/Publisher: Creative Assembly / SEGA

Genre: Action/Adventure

Platform[s]: Xbox 360 / PS3 – (Note: I am reviewing the 360 version of this game)

In a time where it wasn’t just metal-heads who wore their hair long and had funky beards, a war broke out within the realm of the Norse Gods, Asgard.

It all begins when the Goddess Hel (not the be confused with the Swedish rock band), gets extremely pissed off at being banished by Odin (Head-God) from the heavenly realm of Asgard for breaking some rules. Naturally this means she must now rage war against Asgard, and the Gods, killing them all. Like every crazy mythological Norse-Goddess she seeks out Fenrir (big scary wolf) who is destined to, well, start a big-arse battle (Ragnarok) which will ultimately destroy the world.

Now this sounds all a bit scary and doomy, until Freya (Goddess of War) comes onto the scene to stop that evil cow, Hel. This is where YOU come into play my good reader – Freya picks Skarin (a silent young warrior , i.e. you) as her champion of champions. It is your task to save the future of mankind (no pressure) and rid Asgard of the evil forces of Hel.

The game starts with you being resurrected by Freya and told of your destiny.. (OoooOoooo)

Now don’t get TOO excited/disappointed, Viking is your typical hack ‘n slash game. For some this has now brought about a enthusiastic “AWW YEAH!” or a very sad “HEL NO!” (stupid pun intended). I personally enjoy brutally killing random enemies, so this type of gameplay is perfect for me.

In Viking you find yourself armed with an axe and a sword, with which you can cut down your foe quite easily. The added bonus about this set-up are the violent moves that you can perform when slicin’ and dicin’ – This includes beheading and disembowelment in slow-mo. Which is all quite deliciously gory if I do say so myself! There is a training arena where you pay to learn new moves as you advance through the game – I don’t know whether I enjoy this function or loathe it. As an impatient-gamer, I do like how all you have to do is hand over a little gold and are able to cut open your enemies in a whole new fashion. As a proud-gamer, I dislike how you don’t earn the right to use this new moves, they are just store-bought and nothing more.

Viking runs on an open environment which you can explore freely to your heart’s extent. There are three main islands within the game that you must run around, freeing captured Viking’s to add to your army, and destroying enemy bases/camps. At the end of each island-mission you find yourself in a HUGE battle with hundreds of soldiers fighting to their death – Which is, in my opinion, bloody great! (another fully-intended pun)

And the DRAGONS - Dear NorseLordy, how could I forget to tell you about the freakin’ dragons! Alright, so dragons didn’t actually EXIST alongside Vikings (who did exist), but they played a HUGE part within Norse Mythology (which, in case you didn’t realise, plays a huge part in this game) and so dragons live within the realm of Asgard. They’re not your little pets however and they must be summoned to come to your aid. This means killing enemies who drop the dragon runes, powering the runes up within enemy camps and then calling the pretty little flying beasties to provide a nice bit of assistance in completely annihilating the enemy from the air.

Like I said above, I do enjoy a little hack-and-slash adventure game and Viking gives me that joy. The only downsides about the general gameplay the lack of control you have over Skarin at times. I realise that he’s a big ol’ lump and isn’t a nimble little assassin like Altaïr (Assassin’s Creed), but when moving him around the many islands I felt that his general movement was very slow and quite luggish. Many would argue this adds to the realism (how fast COULD a Viking move?), but I find it takes away from the game a little. This is only a small bug-bear however and the epic battles and the amount of gore completely outweighs this minor little annoyance.

I run my Xbox 360 on a 37″ HDTV and so I get to experience the full lot when gaming. I wasn’t expecting to be blown away by Viking’s graphics and my mind wasn’t swayed otherwise since playing it. Don’t get me wrong though, they’re not shit in ANY shape or form. They’re just not jaw-droppingly awesome.

I absolutely love games where I get to experience various different environments outdoors. Viking gives me that pleasure and I have clocked up many hours just running around on grassy fields, sandy beaches and dank caves; all of which are quite pretty to look at.

With nice colours, varying environments and decent cut-scenes Viking gives you a pretty decent set-up.

To sum up – You wont be overly impressed, but I doubt you’ll be disappointed either.

The music score is fine and well-suited to the overall feel of Viking, but the audio is one the aspect of this game I got quite pissy at when playing it. There I am, running about and kicking arse when all of a sudden the music stops playing. Not too bad really because the music will randomly start up again at some point. Frankly, the disappearing-melodies wouldn’t have bothered me too much if the others sounds in this game weren’t so crap. Skarin is a bulky man, this we know, but he’s not an elephant. There are moments within this game where he will be climbing a rope ladder and the sound that comes out is an insanely loud cross between stepping on a thousand crunchy bugs and really squeaky PVC. The first time I heard it I absolutely cringed and tried to get him off that ladder as quickly as I could. This is all backed up with quite wooden voice-acting (not to mention the fact that Skarin doesn’t utter a word throughout the whole of the game) and a sheer lack of audio-atmosphere within the world.

The audio is one of the more major let-downs with Viking and it really is one of those things that can make or break a game. I know I would’ve enjoyed Viking a lot more if the audio was more finely tweaked.

In the Gameplay section I told you about the general gist of the game – Run around Island A/B/C, free captured Vikings, kill lots of enemies, summon dragons and save the day.

There’s nothing else to this game (Aside from finding kegs of mead for the local thirsty drunkards) and unless you really enjoy re-playing old games (or you’re an achievement whore that has missed a few) then there is zero replayability. Viking is the kind of game that does what it says on the tin, nothing more, nothing less. Sucks really because it’s a good game, but that’s what tends to happen to single-player games like this and you’re either ok with that fact or not.

3/5 Vikings – Decent storyline which is nicely backed up with an interesting dose of Norse mythology, great gameplay and good graphics. Let down by shitty audio, repetitiveness and general lack of replayability.

* Thank you to IgorSan for the use of the adorable little Viking-man!

So it’s a slow Friday evening here in Sunny Ol’ England and I have been half-heartedly playing Warcraft III online all night while trying to work out what my first post should be for Girls&Gaming.

Having flipped a coin between reviewing a 360 game I recently added to my ever-growing collection and posting up a comic I made; the cosmic forces of the universe chose the comic.

So, to recap – Silly little comic first, big-arse review later.